Tuesdays are always a bit better than Mondays as they aren't the start of the week and they are that bit closer to the weekend...
Today has been ok I guess. Finally heard back from The King.... although not sure about any of that yet.... too many complications?!?!? Too many headaches, and not sure my heart is in going thru any of that yet as it's elsewhere and needs it's own sat nav (or rather a twat nav) at the moment!!!!
Betsy came round this evening, so we've just been having a girly chit chat about life, holidays and the universe. She got back from Dubai last week so now well jealous and just want to go on holiday.... and wish i could go with someone who would appreciate it. It's so hard sometimes as i get split in two - i'd love to be able to do what my friends do with such a carefree attitude, but can't bear to leave behind the munchkin either....
And following on from yesterday, i find out someone else at work has handed in their notice. This one is different though in the fact they aren't in the close circle of friends i have and socialise with on a regular basis, or someone i would class as being like family in that sense.... but this is someone that is almost like a father figure at work, someone who has cared about and protected so many of us over the past few years, now i/we are going to lose that....
Just adds to the fact that i am losing everyone at the moment and just makes me feel lonely.... the more i carry on the more i just feel like i have done something completely wrong somewhere in life to get to this stage and still feel so lost, and to still be completely alone.... what is wrong with me that no-one ever wants to stick around? And i don't mean that from a work view, more from a personal one.
I don't expect perfection, but within all the imperfection there is still what is a right fit for me! And i guess it is always easy to miss what is right under your nose?
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