That's why I'm back here I guess as writing it down sometimes helps me to make sense of things a little bit, not a lot but a little bit!
Not sure why my biggest dilemmas are over men! I swear that sometimes it really would be easier to just give up altogether on ever finding love as I must be cursed!
I get so close to having what I want to only have it snatched away time and time again.... I really am your typical unlucky in love story, forever the 'almost' one but never THE one?
The funny thing is there are also so many than return to try again after they have initially rejected me but I have some self respect to tell those no, as if they treat me like an option rather than a choice then why would I want to be with them when they come crawling back because it didn't work out?
I know as I am getting older I am less inclined to deal with being treated like crap, but I really do understand that everyone comes with baggage and issues and its not about finding a perfect person that ticks all imaginary boxes, its about finding that imperfect person that's perfect just for me!
At the moment I thought I had found that person... Stupidly I fell for them more than I ever meant too, think its cause I could see the possibilities it had, and I think that if it had been given the chance then it could have possibly been something great, but as my usual luck, curse of the ex came up!
The gf he can't get over... And now because of her jealousy I think I may have even lost him as a friend as he's not allowed to talk to me?
I'm not going to go stalksish on him like my friends sometimes seem to, I guess the only thing I can do is to let him be, if there is supposed to be anything there then I guess it will be eventually?
In the meantime I go back to looking in the pond at the frogs? Which my head is telling me is the right thing to do, but the heart is still saying that it could have been good between us.
Been here before and I know I will be ok, but still....
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